An omen - McDonald's opened an outlet in Minsk, capital of Belarus, the 100th country in its global chain. A gala opening drew thousands to the area. Riot cops, accustomed to breaking up anti-regime protests, promptly waded into the crowds, clubs swinging. Describing it as "a public relations fiasco," the December 26 London Times reported, "McDonald's had touted the event as a watershed in its global expansion and hinted that the opening... was a sign of stability in the world."

Fiddling by Nero - One Wall Street company held its Xmas bash at a posh club atop the World Trade Center. The tab for flowers alone was $40,000. Explained the floral designer, "It wasn't so much about the flowers.... This year it's all about being elegant."

Stripping away oppressive taboo - Commenting on the rash of pre-holiday layoffs, John Challenger, a big-time "outplacement" exec, explained, "What you're seeing is that the traditional holiday taboo that said you don't lay people off... during the holidays really is being whittled away."

As deranged as he's scummy? - "You can't be bored with greatness. It's better to be honestly arrogant than falsely humble." - Albert Dunlap, the job-cutting specialist who's proud to be known as "Chainsaw Al."

History lesson - Prompted by British plans to buy a floating prison from New York, the London Times recalled the similar ships that came into wide use in England in 1775. "Men, women, and children as young as seven were crammed... in stinking holds which compared with the worst of the slave trade ships.... The prisoners who festered beneath their decks were controlled by bored and sadistic officers. The hulks were also a magnet for every form of disease and sickness, and death was rampant."

Read-it-and-retch dep't - In Vietnam, the People's Police paper featured a photo of the winner of a national beauty contest for women jailers. According to Reuters, the Hanoi regime "prides itself on the beauty of its women and contests are held regularly for occupations ranging from street cleaners to market hawkers."

Keep thin - Acting on an obscure 1940 rule, New York cops are handing out $50 fines to subway riders who they say are taking up more than one seat. Like, a college student got a ticket while riding in a car that had but one other passenger. The other guy got a ticket too.

Suggestion box - How about busting the folks who run the New York subway system and, during rush hours, stuff in 10 passengers for every seat?  
 
 
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