Shucks - In Sheffield, England, a posted letter to employees at a McDonald's franchise advises: "You may be aware of the rumor-that McDonald's donates money to the IRA [Irish Republican Army]. There is absolutely no truth to this rumor." The writer believes that the fable stems from the fact that U.S. employees can sign up for IRA [Individual Retirement Account] payroll deductions. The letter was dated 1992, so apparently they're still denying it.
There's something funny - We readily accept McDonald's assurance that it never contributed to the Irish liberation struggle. Our question is, how does someone working for McDonald's wages afford an IRA?
That makes it a lesser or greater crime? - The three Cincinnati cops who were filmed macing a Black youth and kicking him in the ribs were "punished." One was transferred and the other two suspended for five days. A spokesman for the cops "union" bleated they had only done what their trainers had taught them.
It was ordered by the Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms agency? - Obviously mortified, the feds agreed to return 75 million bullets seized from a California company shortly after the Oklahoma bombing. At the time of the full-dress raid it was suggested the bullets had been illegally imported and were, perhaps, intended for militia groups. In announcing the return, a U.S. prosecutor snapped, "No comment."
The justice system - "After serving less than two months of a one- year sentence, a former New York state trooper convicted in an evidence-tampering scandal was granted early release by a Delaware County panel." - News item.
American as apple pie - An Atlanta Journal Constitution dining-out guide recommended the "Big House Special" at a local pub: "Here's something really different....reflects what's on the menu that day at one of the local prisons.... Look for inmate favorites such as beef stroganoff, macaroni and cheese, and green Jell-O served on washable, nonlethal plastic trays."
Can't be too nosy - The Los Angeles Times reported that in neighboring Ventura County there's been more than a dozen sewage spills this year, with up to 2 million gallons of raw sewage and other toxins running into the Pacific. The article spotlights the fact that Ventura officials don't bother to post required beach warnings when the spills occur. But it doesn't even ask what's being done about a sewage system with two major spills a month.
Free-market multiculturalism - The Mattel company is busy turning out Pocahontas and John Smith dolls. The heads are strictly from Disney, but the bodies are Barbie and Ken. An exec explains: "Certain efficiencies can be achieved that allow for us to make profitable merchandise at retail prices that are very reasonable."